Vivian is my mother. She now calls herself "Baltimore Mom" in tag lines in our back and forth emails. Although she was tough on mainly my older brother. I still felt the wrath of her love every now and then but not much because I was just such a well behaved kid :) She was my "earth" mother and my father. She is intelligent, educated and opinionated. Strong willed, determined and persistent. She never takes crap from no man or woman for that matter.
She always told me "God blesses the child who has his own" I grew up to be very bohemian by nature I believe. Not by nuture. Especially compared to her way of thinking. I find her to be practical and methodical. At times when I do think practical in life, and I certainly do have that trait when it serves me to, I draw on her knowledge and wisdom. I wouldn't be me without her.
She labored 9 months and at that point my dad was already passed away. How strong was she to raise me without the love of her life in physical form? Absolutely strong. Stronger than I ever could know. Girls I have dated want to whine because I may have decided to take a little space. My dad took infinite space. And this was before she gave birth, when she was pregnant, and she still persisted. She dealt with a form of abandonment most human beings never experienced. I know some who haven't been to a funeral in their lives. Anyhow. The good news is she BY HERSELF still accomplished more great achievements in her life than I could ever imagine one person accomplishing coming from where she came and the obstacles that were put in her way that she overcame.
And through it all she never stopped loving my dad and teaching me to honor his legacy. And through it all I never truly had to worry about my mother not loving me. She barely put her own needs over mine and my brother. And without us even asking her to do that. Just because she knew no other way to live than to love us unconditionally even when we made her blood boil. I FRIGGIN HONOR MY MOM.
To this day even though I may listen to my own intuition and take heed to my own path in life. I still honor her. I still respect that whenever she speaks to me, whether harshly or in a tone I don't like. Its only because she loves me and she wants the best for me. She can call herself "Baltimore Mom" because she is. She is the "Baltimore Mom" that educated herself, rose to the highest position and biggest office space in her job, who graduated with honors and lived to beat Cancer, and climb the ancient pyramids with her son while she was still in treatment! She can make slight jokes about tough love and being "Baltimore Mom". It doesn't phase me. She deserves it. She can wear any badge she sees fit with me. I only get one biological mother in this life time and Mrs Williams is who I cherish and honor day by day as such.
Comments